Thursday, August 16, 2012

think happy thoughts

each day i am more happy of where i am in my life, and where i live.  moving to a new place with a new job with a stranger for a roommate is scary .  i left everyone i knew behind in ohio, and had to start brand new.  this meant starting from scratch on friends too.  i didn't know anyone around me, not even anyone walking down the street or in the grocery store.  i only knew my amazing friends who helped me get my job here, but even then, they were a city away.

this whole experience has been tough.  as social as i feel like i am, it's sort of weird making new friends as an adult.  asking for someone's number to hang out on the weekends or go grab a drink or a cup of coffee feels like asking someone out on a date (can anyone tell me i'm not a total weirdo on this one?) and without some sort of connection through a friend or event, how do you approach a random stranger to talk to?

when mr p and i moved into our jersey city apartment, we were very optimistic about this new and very different place, even though it was only about a mile south of hoboken.  though we had our handful of core, close friends, we were anxious to meet more people and build a network of like-minded friends.  slowly we met our neighbors, and learned that our block is filled with diverse, friendly, amazing people that we can say hi to and have a chat on the sidewalk, something we had yet to experience while living in hoboken.

since joining our kickboxing class at JC Taekwondo, everything seems to have been falling into place.  i'm not sure if it's our more positive attitudes from working out, or if we are really just excited to see other people on a daily basis besides coworkers and each other, probably a combination of both.

either way, lately, it's just... been... nice... we've been surrounded by new friends, all anxious to build friendships as well.  in the back of my mind i feel guilty that we haven't gone back to ohio often enough to see our families, but sometimes there are small sacrifices to make to be happy. it really does take time and effort to build good friendships with those around us without going home every weekend (who'da thought??)  i think we've always been happy here, it's just that there was an emptiness in the place of where all of our ohio friends and family used to be, now that they aren't just a quick walk or drive away (skype has been a lifesaver to some of them!!) thankfully they will all still be there for us, whether we are 6 blocks away or 600 miles away.

do you know that feeling i'm talking about? when things just feel like they are all falling into place when, really, no "life-changing events" are happening?

it's nice, isn't it?



dreaming en francais said...

This is such a lovely and thoughtful post! I totally get where you're coming from -- I've considered moving away for grad school, and I always feel like it will be extremely difficult to be in a new city/state far from everyone that I know. Great to hear that you've made new friends!

Unknown said...


J and I totally understand. It IS weird to make new friends as an adult... and complicated! You have all kinds of other responsibilities. It sounds like you are both in the same place we are... really accepting where you are (and feeling grateful) and finding the delicate balance. Tough stuff, sometimes! We definitely need to work something out SOON :)

Jo Dhesi said...

great post :)

Laura Darling said...

It is definitely harder to make friends as you get older! Glad things are going well for you!

jenn @ beyond the stoop said...

thanks, girls! it's all sort of an odd subject to talk about, right?